Friends forever: How sibling rivalry blossomed into a lifelong friendship

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As kids, we may have appeared to be arch-enemies, but as we matured, the attachment became as strong as the love between us. I consider myself to be very blessed for having, apart from warm and loving parents, a brother, who entered my life a year after I was born. Being the first child, I was usually the one who had to take heed of all parenting advice before my brother was old enough to take a stand.

From pesky little brother to wise best friend 

As we got into our teens, our relationship began to improve somewhat. I liked to play big sister to him and raised pettifogging objections as well. I protected and teased him at the same time. Although our relationship has been through a whole slew of ups and downs, now that we both belong to the adult group of the family, I consider my brother to be one of the most caring and wise individuals I know.

The evolution of a sibling relationship

I catch myself often traveling back in time and remembering with nostalgia those instances when we felt compelled to fight over a toy or a t-shirt or an extra scoop of ice cream. I smile when I recall those nights when mother used to sing me a lullaby “nanhi pari sone chali” from an old Hindi flick, to which my brother used to ask mom ‘don’t you have a song for me?’ Now that’s a different story that at last she had to use ‘nanha para sone chala’, as he did not settle with any other song.

Mother was always ready to tell the stories of lovely princesses, talking frogs, fairies, and beasts. The tone of her voice and the moral of the story always made us wake up with a feeling of excitement that “everything in life is possible”. Well, I am proud to admit that my brother has proved that old saying. By being confident in his abilities to experience the world, he has become a promising professional in his field.

Growing up, growing closer 

Our relationship has changed considerably over the years, while at the beginning it was more or less similar to the one between any brother and sister. Fights over petty stuff and jealous of each other, but somehow we managed through similar experiences to establish a very sincere channel of communication. I am grateful to give him my advice when he asks (and sometimes when he doesn’t), not to be afraid to raise an argument that might not find him in agreement, and speaking with him whenever I please. He is one of the people with whom I can laugh and cry without later feeling embarrassed.

Siblings by birth, best friends by choice

My sincere wish for both of us is to continue opening up with each other, learn from each other’s mistakes, and of course, increase the frequency of visits to each other. Having a younger brother is one of those things in life I cherish and I consider myself extremely lucky for being able to have one. A brother is a little bit of childhood that is never lost. An American author and journalist, Anna Marie Quindlen, once said: “There is a little boy inside the man who is my brother. Oh, how I hated that little boy and how I love him now.”

(http://www.tribuneindia.com/2010/20101203/edit.htm#5) Published in the 'Middle' section of The Tribune, Chandigarh

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